Below are exercises designed to help you incorporate personal experiences into your conversations subtly. The goal is not merely to share for the sake of expression but to guide the other person in a certain direction towards a particular perspective or action.
Scenario: Annoying Colleague
Imagine a friend confides in you about difficulties at work. She has a colleague who is nasty to her. To avoid confrontation, she has started avoiding this colleague, which is draining her energy. What would you advise her to do?
- Suggest looking for a new job as the best solution;
- Encourage her to provide direct feedback to the colleague as a means of resolving the conflict;
- Recommend having a discussion with both the colleague and her supervisor;
- Advise her not to let the colleague's behavior affect her so much.
Select one of these options (or draw from your own insights) and contemplate how you could share a relevant personal experience to illustrate your point. Instead of directly advising her to search for a new job, for instance, share a story that leads to that conclusion. You might end with, "Perhaps, this could be a suitable approach for you as well."
Workload Challege
Imagine a colleague is overwhelmed by their workload. While you also have a substantial workload, you manage it effectively. If you wish to suggest:
- Speaking with the boss about the workload, or
- Learning to decline additional tasks more often.
Consider sharing a relevant personal story to guide your advice. It's crucial, however, to avoid prefacing your anecdote with phrases like "I used to struggle with this too," as it might seem insubstantial.
Leadership Vacuum
In another scenario, a colleague is struggling with a proposal due to a lack of guidance from the project manager, making it difficult to know when the proposal meets the board's standards. You believe she shoudl either:
- Take initiative, write the proposal based on her judgment, and not overly concern herself with others' opinions, or
- Wait for explicit instructions from the project manager before proceeding.
Instead of giving direct advice, how could you relay a story from your experiences to subtly convey your suggestion? Crafting your anecdote carefully will help illustrate your point effectively.